Ok, I know exactly what you are thinking right now: why is she talking about suicide? So let me start by telling you I am not suicidal (am 100% sure) and I am not that low in the pits of depression that I would think death is better than life (I am very far from that and also for the record: death has never been my favourite subject, let alone be a solution to anything in life). The reason everyone around me walks on egg shells when topics like these come up is obvious and I know it is based on compassion and love for me – clinical depression is known to have caused many such deaths and they fear I will get “affected” in some way. Now that you know there is nothing to worry about, let me share what all is on my mind and why I started writing this post.
Someone I didn’t know personally, but connected to people around me, decided to end his life last week. A similar incident had happened last year and I have personally seen the hell the family and loved ones go through post such deaths. And that starts the chain of discussion on why someone would kill themselves, how unfair of them not to think about their parents and children and in a lot many ways – why it is a wrong thing to do (as decided by most religions and laws). And that brings the curious me to think what could the person be feeling before they choose death?
Robin Williams. Guru Dutt. Van Gogh. Kurt Cobain. Marilyn Monroe. Ernest Hemmingway. Nafisa Joseph. Some had a history of drug abuse. Some had mental illnesses like depression and others. Some were going through heart breaks and financial stress. I do understand the brief connect we have of sympathy when we read an article or a suicide note – but what I trying to get your attention is the bottomless pit of pain and despair the person would have been stuck in leading to the tragic event. I am not even sure what I am trying to explain and am at a loss for words – I read each such name and think of the mad fury of emotions or the complete emptiness the heart felt when it decided to end it’s known life (am sure some assumed there is better life after this death). All I am requesting is close your eyes and try connecting to the person’s state of mind to be able to empathise and send love where ever they are now. Please don’t discuss their families with unkindness or gossip about the reasons you deem fit or post social media status about ” #someoneisalwayslistening ” to prevent.
If the above strikes a note and you really think you want to try and help – get off the apps and screens and television and talk to the person next to you. You can chat or just smile at the person around or call up someone you care about and know is going through a tough phase. The next time you feel the urge to take a break from work, how about taking a flight to visit some ageing family member (parents/ aunts/ uncles) and spend a day sharing happy old memories. If you don’t have the time for all this, try genuinely smiling at strangers and people around – you never know how much your simple act of kindness might affect a soul in despair. I am not an expert and I am definitely not trying to preach. Right now I just have a heart connected to the despair a suicidal person feels and I wish all the love and kindness in the world makes way into their heart. Will all this change the outcome and save lives? I don’t know. If you have personally lost someone in such a tragic manner, you know it is not possible to foresee or stop such tragedies even if you did do all the above and more. Sometimes God has plans we don’t understand at all – that’s the only explanation I have for so much random pain in the world.However, if your efforts have even a 0.1% chance of saving one life – it’s all worth it.
If you have personally lost someone in such a tragic manner, you know it is not possible to foresee or stop such tragedies even if you did do all the above and more. Sometimes God has plans we don’t understand at all – that’s the only explanation I have for so much random pain in the world.I know the pain of losing a loved one especially in their youth….and I know it takes forever to come to terms with it if you happen to be the one left behind living.However, if your efforts have even a 0.1% chance of saving one life – it’s all worth it.
However, if your efforts have even a 0.1% chance of saving one life – it’s all worth it.Even if you are able to save one life unknowingly – you are a superhero.
P.S. I have spend a couple of days wondering if I should be writing the above post because of course I don’t want to hurt anyone. But then I chose to be truw to myself and write what I felt…thank you for bearing with it.